Somehow I Just Knew This Was Coming

I'm blogging about recent events again... someone stop me before I go apeshit.

So, it's disgusting enough that Jdimytai Damour got crushed to death at Wal-Mart on Black Friday. I just saw the autopsy revealed the cause of death was asphyxiation. Imagine, trying to catch a breath while hundreds of feet are pounding on your chest - feet that are racing to get gasp! ohmygod! a LCD TV for $200 off! It infuriates and sickens me.

So yea, that's bad enough. But guess what? Now there's more. And I bet you could smell this coming from a mile away.

Wait for it... wait for it...

Customers injured in the crush are suing Wal-Mart!

I'm trying to figure out why, if I'm so disgusted, I'm sitting here stifling a laughing fit so I don't wake Dave up in the other room. I probably want to laugh because people are so goddamn ugly and predictable.

Attorney Kenneth Mollins said Fritz Mesadieu and Jonathan Mesadieu were "literally carried from their position outside the store" and are now "suffering from pain in their neck and their back from being caught in that surge of people" that rushed into the Wal-Mart.

I bet the pain in their neck and back is nothing compared to what Jdimytai Damour went through.

And even better:

In a claim against the Nassau County police department, the men also contend that they "sustained monetary losses as a result of health care and legal expenses ... in the sum of $2 million."

Wow, that's a nice round number. Health care and legal expenses, my ass. I had full blown knee surgery a couple of years ago - cost of everything, including surgery, drugs, months of physical therapy, and a year's worth of followups with a rheumatologist ran somewhere in the neighborhood of $30K. Sure, not a straight up comparison, but give me a fucking break. My theory? See, since they were "carried from their position outside the store", they weren't able to get that gasp! ohmygod! LCD TV for $200 off, so they figure a cool $2 million should allow them to get any TV they want... even if it's not on sale!

He said his clients and others who were at the scene contend that the police "were there ... saw what was happening, and they left."

Really? So maybe they should sue the police, too!

Maybe Wal-Mart is partially at fault. Who would have thought a business would need full-blown riot control on Black Friday? Maybe the videotape should be investigated and these two asswipes can sue everyone who "carried" them outside the store. If they'd do that, though, they'd probably have to settle for buying a much smaller TV with their lawsuit winnings.

And maybe on their way home from Wal-Mart that day those guys should have stopped at the McDonald's drive-thru and got themselves a nice, hot cup of coffee.

I guess for some, thankfulness for being alive isn't enough.