Fun Search Phrases

I'm presently looking at the pitiful stats of my weblog and I just have to giggle at some of the "Keyphrases Used on Search Engines" section. Here are some interesting ones:

how insurance compaines screw you
How do they screw thee? Let me count the ways...

irish shower
I'm glad I'm not the only one having an issue with this.

contacts move with allergies
Sorry, it's either scratch your eyes out of their sockets or get laser surgery.

when ipl treatment doesn't work
That's when I'll need some serious psychotherapy. Not only will I have a red face, but I'll be out $1500.

milf lessons
I don't think I've ever addressed this amusing little course of study. But here's a hint: if you need lessons, you shouldn't be looking for a milf.

poker night recipes
Here's one: Ingredients: buy-in money, a chair, 5-6 buddies (preferably ones who are easy to read), deck of cards, chips. Directions: Bet hard. Bet smart. Sprinkle with a liberal amount of bullshitting and bluffing. Proceed for several hours, ignoring the feeling of numbness in your ass. Pocket prize money. Go buy shoes.

caffeine withdrawl
getoverit,it'snotgoingtogoawayjusthaveacokealready.

free ice cream man by eddie murphy
While I admire the desire for such a funny piece of comedy, $0.99 to download it from iTunes ain't going to break the bank.